answered prayers
thanks god..its been a signal. now im gonna lock my door for now…few days ago that thing has been struggling my mind.two days ago ive made up my mind then suddenly yesterday things got frustrated again…ive got worried and think of the sake of others again….but god is so great. and now my decision will never be a decision…now its gonna be final. au revoir =) with full of relief. ill make it up with the right and bright side =)
why do i always have to consider the emotions of others? when i have already made my decision, then one look back to them, seeing their not good, i cant help but to turn around and offer my shoulder..and it has always been the same scenery..sometimes i juz wanna kept all my emotions in one box and lock it so that i wont look back..again..so that i can leave without considering you..uhmm i have to do it for myself..coz in considering you i forgot to consider myself.give me few more chance of stupidity and every-things gonna be over. its for my betterment.. we need to be mature and i cant do it together with you..there are maturities found away from a happy hearts..and i guess its the only thing thats missing in me. let’s leave it clueless..rest heart rest mind rest soul.
sometimes things fall apart not because you held it loose…. but because you held too tight….
I believe every human has a finite number of heartbeats. I don’t intend to waste any of mine.
Mental imbalance is about as acceptable as herpes. It’s never going to be accepted. But really, it’s a disease just like cancer. It just happens, and eats away all the good parts of your brain, like judgment and happiness and perception and memory and life. And you can die from depression just like any other disease. And it’s not as if people choose it. So why is it still a joke of medicine? “She died of cancer” is a lot more socially acceptable to people than “she committed suicide”. Why?
The woman who follows the crowd will usually go no further than the crowd. The woman who walks alone is likely to find herself in places no one has ever been before.
No matter how careful you are, there’s going to be the sense you missed something, the collapsed feeling under your skin that you didn’t experience it all. There’s that fallen heart feeling that you rushed right through the moments where you should’ve been paying attention.
There are certain emotions in your body that not even your best friend can sympathize with, but you will find the right film or the right book, and it will understand you.
I thought about life, about my life, the embarrassments, the little coincidences, the shadows of alarm clocks on bedside tables, I thought about my small victories and everything I’d seen destroyed. I’d swum through mink coats on my parents’ bed while they hosted downstairs, I’d lost the only person with whom I could have spent my only life, I’d left behind a thousand tonnes of marble from which I could have released sculptures, I could have released myself from the marble of myself, I’d experienced joy, but not nearly enough, could there be enough? The end of suffering does not justify the suffering…
